Hunting for the Moon Shadow

Thursday, March 30, 2006
Tuesday 28th of March at 7 P.M. we started our trip of about 700 K.M. to Saloum hunting for the Moon Shadow, known as Solar eclipse.

A day before that, Monday, it rained heavily here in Cairo, and heard that it was the same in Saloum. Was very disappointed. Was afraid the weather conditions won’t allow us to see it. But you know what, the weather was just perfect.

Reached Saloum at about 7:30 A.M. where we had to park our cars a distance far from the place we were supposed to be for watching the eclipse. Then we took a bus from the cars park to that place prepared by the Saloum governorate for us to watch.

Sleeping was the first thing people thought of.. LOL.. especially those who were driving. I didn’t sleep, since I almost was sleeping all the way. I just sat there enjoying the beauty of the place. It was my first time to Saloum, a very nice place The weather was very nice, and the sea looked beautiful. I needed nothing more. Sallum

After people had their nap, they started preparing their cameras. People who didn’t have specific lenses and filters for shooting the eclipse kept coming out with inventions to filter the sun rays and be able to have a good shot. It was fun watching them :D Preparing the camera

The eclipse started at about 11:25 P.M. when the Moon started coming in slowly hiding part of the sun bit by bit. At about 12:20 it started to get colder, when the sun was like a crescent. The total eclipse was at about 12:30, it suddenly got dark, it looked beautiful. Everything around was just amazing, the sea, as if it was sunset, looking further, you will notice that there is that line after which there is light. Was hoping to see stars, but I didn’t. The only thing I saw was a satellite, which people thought it was a star. total solar eclipse
at the moment of eclipse
It lasted for about two minutes or may be less, when it suddenly lighted again. Really it’s an amazing feeling to witness. It deserves hunting for it all that way. Some say, seeing it for once, will make you follow it wherever it is. Do you think that’s true?! Only days will prove it ;)

Check out this blog, and that one, they have interesting stories.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 8:43 PM, | 6 comments

My week end

Saturday, March 25, 2006
Friday
Went to the spring flower exhibitions at El Orman park.
Bought a new pink roses tree. I’ve decided to be the one in charge of our small garden. It was my grandfather who used to take care of it, but he is no longer capable of doing this. I’ve decided to handle this job. I know nothing about gardening and plants, but I’ll learn. I hope to make a good job.

Saturday
Celebrating my first 6 months of work.
Our usual family gathering at my grandparents, where my cousin started giving me the ABCs of playing a guitar. Was very happy.. and I guess I’ll go for having guitar classes. I just hope no one will oppose my decision.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 9:44 PM, | 2 comments

Privacy phobic!!

Since I was a little girl, I’ve always had my own world away from people. It only involved me and myself. Used to enjoy it very much. Talking, debating, thinking.. I was developing my own self. Then I started to feel the gap between the two of us, the one I know in that private world of mind, and that other one which I expose to people.

I guess when I was at primary or so I used to understand most of the things around. Sometimes I felt I’m not to supposed to, and as a result I used to show that other naïve face of mine.

I grew older, but I still followed the same methodology. Having my own thoughts, ideas, opinions. To the extent that sometimes I might be sitting among people who are having a conversation about certain thing, I might be very interested in, but I used to express my opinion internally. Rarely exposed my opinions out. Have no idea what was the reason. Sometimes I think that I feared that my opinions are not welcomed, and I’m still a kid who understands nothing. Other times, I felt that I don’t need anyone to be aware of how I think, not to be aware that I think at the first place.

I remained with that private world of mine till I started sharing in discussion forums. It was the beginning of exposing my hidden ideas out loud. At the beginning I was trying to be cautious to see how am I going to be accepted by the surrounding environment. To my surprise, I was welcomed and had a positive feedback, that gave me a very strong push to write more, to express more, to think and share.

But still, that virtual expressing of mine became part of my private world except for those very few whom I accepted that they get into that private world of mine.

More and more, I started getting out of that private world and be exposed more to the outer world. At times I regretted it because I felt it resembles security holes in my life, other times it felt amazing to share with other people.

My blog became part of that virtual private world of mine, thought I’ll be able to control it to remain as private and I wished it to be, but unfortunately it didn’t.

When I started thinking about it, I wondered what is it that I’m fearing?! Why do I prefer everything in my life to remain private, even very simple things.

One of these things, though I think it’s a major one, was my virtual name. Did my best to hide it, and don’t let anyone know about it. Was shocked when I found out that my brother knew about it. OMG.. I couldn’t believe it, was very mad at him. But when I thought about it, I felt extremely ridiculous. What’s the problem?! What difference will that make?! Why am I hiding the name anyways?! Why am I hiding myself?!

I just can’t imagine people invading my private world that easy..
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 12:17 AM, | 2 comments

A sudden drop down

Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Wasn’t expecting that fast swing of mood! I’ve been going through a very good mood since last Thursday, and everyday the mood was going higher, but it stopped today. A sudden drop down, without a reason.

Was planning for something, but I guess I was too lazy to do it. May be I’m upset from myself for that. May be other reasons, don’t know.

I feel there is something missing in my life. Can’t figure it out, but I’m sure it’s missing. Have a lot of thoughts running through my head, but all are just bits and pieces of everything. Can’t grab a certain idea, focus on it, and reach a conclusion. A conclusion?! May be that’s the reason why. I rarely reach a conclusion. I leave myself in the middle of nowhere, torturing myself with all these thoughts. Sometimes I wish I was dumb.

Watched some episodes of the TV series called Sarah.. wished I was like her. Wished I had the capability to leave that whole world and go into and endless sleep. The world is getting more cruel everyday. You see the good side of it, and say there is hope. But the other side sometimes proves it’s stronger.

Why am I saying this?! Don’t know. It was just a thought that crossed my mind while I was watching that series.

Couple of days ago I had intensions for closing that blog, and may be deleting it all in all, but didn’t have the courage to do it. Was surprised today to know that Nermeena is leaving, felt very sad, but after all I respect her decision. Don't know what's going on with the blogsphere, people are leaving one after the other :(
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 9:57 PM, | 6 comments

Another day to remember :)

Sunday, March 19, 2006
As I attended ACES’s opening, I wished to attend the closing, and I did.

It was in el 3’oryya.. a nice place.. but most important, it was a nice company.. I know some of them, but I don’t know the majority. However, it felt as if I know every single person of them.. I was happy to see that happiness in their eyes. Was stuck with words.. was very proud, excited, happy, grateful.. don’t know what exactly. But these people really made a difference. It’s not in my life, nor in my brother’s, it’s bigger than that. They are paving a new road.. they are planting a new plant.. they are putting the basic bricks.. they are dreaming, not only for themselves, but for others. For their colleagues, their faculty, their community, their country. They didn’t stop at dreaming, but they took it their responsibility to turn that dream into reality. As one of them said today, ACES is a dream, but it’s not a one person’s dream, what gave it that power that it’s a group’s dream. A group of people who dreamt together, believed in their selves and their capabilities.

No matter how long I write and describe, I can’t convey a tiny part of what these people did, how I felt, or the happiness I saw in their eyes. I saw cooperation, love, friendship, teamwork, responsibility… and more..

ACES.. though I wasn’t one of your team members, nor one of your participants, but these four letters means a lot to me. I was affected, I saw that there is nothing that is impossible, I saw how a dream could be turned to reality.

It is not an easy work.. they worked hard, faced obstacles that might have hindered them, but they were stronger than anything. They believed that they have a message to deliver to others, they are responsible for taking the hands of their colleagues to make them better, and they did.

ACES.. Thank you for making me believe that there is still hope.

BTW, Ramy, you are a good presenter ;)
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 11:30 PM, | 3 comments

The five minutes conversation!!

Saturday, March 18, 2006
I’m the kind of a person who always needs to share what she is feeling with others. I always have that need of talking whether I’m sad or happy. Especially if I’m happy. I feel I need to share my happiness with the whole world. Keep talking about the reasons of my happiness. In conclusion, I’m the kind who always needs to talk, though this is contradictory to what I actually do.

Whatever the reasons are, the case now is I’m having a bad need to talk, but I can’t, and I don’t know the reason for me not being able to talk about it.

It was less than a five minutes conversation, but that thing working in my head made a big story out of it. Couldn’t deny the feeling, but couldn’t admit it at the same time. My mind won’t be at ease without analyzing the whole thing, and knowing how did this feeling manage to get through.

I don’t like it. I don’t like that one sided thing. I feel I’m making a big deal out of nothing. That’s a fact unfortunately. However, can’t get the whole thing out of my mind. I’m having that five minutes conversation recalled in my mind all day long. Thinking of nothing except it. Nothing was said during it. But it meant a lot. Still, it’s all out of my imagination. Stupid me!
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 1:14 AM, | 0 comments

Moon is happy

Thursday, March 16, 2006
Kept wondering for the reason.. would it be the full moon nights that is working like magic for me?!

I’m unconditionally extremely happy for two consecutive days. Amazing.

Yesterday and today I was extremely surprising myself. Don’t know how exactly. But I was very happy, to the extent that it reflected on my dealing with people. Was socializing.. talking.. laughing.. was really feeling happy from the heart.

Though, yesterday I went back to my shell very soon and continued the outing just smiling and listening, but still I was enjoying myself.

Today is another story. Was going back from work jumping with joy, was feeling very hyperactive. Went home quickly, changed my clothes, and went out to attend the opening of ACES 2006 (2nd Annual Conference for Engineering Students). Attending it made me reach the peak of my happiness and hyperactivity.

My brother is a participant in the conference. I know a lot of people there, most of them are from my school, or was with me in one of the student conferences at the AUC. I like that. Seeing a lot of people whom I haven’t seen for a long time.

Still, felt as if I’m a parent for my brother. Sometimes I feel I’m responsible for him. As if he is my little son whom I should be taking care of. Was feeling very proud of him. Asked my friends to give me feed back about how he is going. How is he progressing?! Was happy to hear a positive feed back. Was really happy.

Back to the opening. It was very nice. Wished I participated in that conference by anyway. But still, I felt the passion for it, as if I was a part of it. Found tears coming to my eyes, seeing their dream coming true. Something that they worked for very hard through the months to make it see the light. I’m really proud of them all. And I’m proud of my school graduates.

What do you think? I’m a kid, right? Small things can make me very happy. Yes, some might not understand what’s about it that is making me that happy, but I was touched in the heart. Their positive energy was spreading all over the place.. Blue, I gotta thank you, if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have attended. Check her post here, and another post by geraldine.

Couldn't stop myself from quoting Blue's words here, she is more expressive than I am.. She wrote,

نفسى دلوقتى اعيش لحد ما ادخل احفاد احفادى هندسة، ويبقى
ACES 2344
واقول لهم فى يوم من الأيام كان مجموعة صغيرة، صغيرة قوى... اشتركوا مع بعضهم فى حلم، لونوه ازرق سنة... والسنة اللى وراها أخضر -حبيته قوى-... وسنة ورا سنة، اوراق الشجر تتجدد، ويطلع برعم جديد... لحد ما الشجرة كبرت، واوراقها بقت بالوان كتير.. وعلى كل فرع صورة لمجموعة تانية اكبر شوية... وجزء تانى للحلم يكمل، ويترك وراه علامات طريق

اشوفكم فى
ACES 2007

وحظ اوفر لبتوع سنة رابعة

I still have my secret reasons for being happy ;)

 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 11:58 PM, | 2 comments

Adapting or Adjusting?!

Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Get yourself adapted to the surrounding environment?!

Or

Adjust your surrounding environment to meet your needs?!
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 11:04 PM, | 3 comments

Monday, March 13, 2006
I started the day stressed, was having a task which I should have finished early in the morning, but I didn’t. It took me the whole day to finish it. Was going to be very depressed if I didn’t finish it today. I did finish it, but still not in a perfect way. I mean, it’s not that good, would loved to make it in a better way, but was very short in time. Still will show it to my manager tomorrow, I’m hoping he would like it.

Was planning to go for a Flute & Harp Recital at the Opera, but thanks to all the people I know, no one was encouraged to come, and my parents are still following that theory of “no going on your own”. Wanted badly to go.

This same scenario is happening quite often these days. I like to attend concerts, lectures, watch movies, attend exhibitions, workshops, whatever it is. But my parents are surrounding me that extra fear. They are making things hard for me by conditioning my going out by people. Why?!! I don’t know. I can’t stand that anymore.

Anyways, I still have a long struggle with them for something that will be taking place by the end of the month. Can’t imagine they will prevent me from going.

Lately I’ve not been in a good mood, having conflicts with myself which I need to resolve. I need for once to feel peace within.

Kept listening to al wada3 by Fairouz all day long. An amazing song.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 10:30 PM, | 4 comments

What do you think of me?!

Saturday, March 11, 2006
Would like to know what do my blog readers think of me..

Would appreciate it if you answer this and that.

Thank you.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 2:27 PM, | 0 comments

A good friend?!

Am I a good friend?! Just wondering.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 1:32 PM, | 3 comments

Talk so I can see you!



That’s what my boss once said to me, “Talk so I can see you!”

What if I don’t want you to see me?! What if I don’t want you to know my inner self?!

Would that be a reason why I don’t talk?! Because I don’t want people to see me?! If it’s so, then why? What’s the problem in people getting to know the real me?! Why do I always hide her?! Replace her by another dump naïve one. Why do I always think that I don’t understand, though I do. Why do I feel insecure if I talked. Why do I find it always difficult to turn my thoughts into spoken words?!

Why am I the person I am?! Am I a good one?! Am I a bad one?!
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 1:09 PM, | 7 comments

I wished..

Wednesday, March 08, 2006
I wished to be an astronaut ..
I wished to be a geologist ..
I wished to be a teacher ..
I wished to be a radio announcer ..
I wished to be a lawyer ..
I wished to be a business women ..
I wished to be a crafts shop owner ..
I wished to be a fashion designer ..
I wished to be an interior designer ..
I wished and wished ..

But I never wished to be who I am!
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 9:35 PM, | 10 comments

Blue tagged me

Was tagged by Blue .

What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Simple life. Making someone happy. Affecting the life of people positively.

What is your greatest fear?
Loosing dear people.

Which historical figure do you most identify with?
none, as far as I know.

Which living person do you most admire?
All those who affected me. Whether they are my family, friends, people who just passed my life to leave their footprints.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
My low self esteem.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?
fahlwa, over complimenting, exagerating

What is your greatest extravagance?
Stationary, beeds, anything that has to do with crafts.

On what occasion do you lie?
May be I used to when I was a kid to get myself out of trouble, but currently I don’t, or I try my best not to.

What do you dislike most about your appearance?
Umm.. looking young.

Which living person do you most despise?
No one specifically.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
mashy, umm.., bas..,

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
Be more self confident.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Being the person I am and the one I’m hoping to be.

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?
A flower.

If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?
The Moon.

Who are your favorite writers?
I don’t have favorite writers.

Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
Don’t have any in mind.

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Loosing people you love.

Where would you like to live?
Sinia desert, or Korea.

What is your most marked characteristic?
Quiet, shy.

What is the quality you most like in a woman?
I don’t like any!

What is your greatest regret?
Being an obedient student.

What OR Who is the greatest love of your life?
…

How would you like to die?
Without pain.

I’ll tag:
Anyone from my sidebar who would like to do it.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 12:02 AM, | 4 comments

My week

Friday, March 03, 2006
Finally this horrible week is over. I started it in a very bad mood. Was very stressed and depressed. Things weren’t going smoothly at work, and I even wasn’t in the mood at all to work. I guess Monday was the peak of my depression. Though I was having an outing with my team after work. But may be that was reason, I don’t like outings I’m not in the mood for.

Well, went out hoping I’ll sit with them for a while then either I’ll catch up with a friend somewhere else or I’ll go home early. Did none of them. Wasn’t able to excuse myself and leave early.

When I went home I was in a horrible state. It wasn’t cause I didn’t enjoy my stay. No, it wasn’t bad after all. But I was feeling worried about something. Was very nervous and stressed. Went to bed, but couldn’t shut down that thing in my head and sleep. Was feeling tension all over my body. Felt I need something to get that out. Couldn’t think of something. Thought of listening to the radio, but nothing was there, thought of reading, but wasn’t in the mood to read any of the stuff I have. Was in a bad need to talk. Let it out by talking. It was late, couldn’t call any of my friends. Didn’t find any of my online friends. Kept going in circles in the house. I need to let it out, but I can’t, not even by writing.

Didn’t know what happened after that, most probably I got tired of going around the house and I slept.

Next day I was feeling better, but still the stress was there. Tried to forget all about it. I managed to do so, got myself busy with work I have. Was planning to go visit a friend of mine together with another friend, but it was canceled. However, I was in a bad need to make a change, to go out, do something different. Went home, asked my mum if she still wants to go to the cinema, and she agreed.

We didn’t find the movie we wanted, we went to another cinema to find out that it’s still not out. Suggested to watch another one, but we were already late.

Invited my mum for a cup of Nescafe and had my cup of hot chocolate. That lifted the mood a lot. Was in a very bad need for it, and thank God it worked.

Wednesday went fine, was almost in a good mood, had a meeting with a number of very nice people I must say. For the first time I find users who appreciate what we are doing. That lifted the mood more. By Thursday I was fine, but still not feeling like working at all.

Today was attending one of my friends katb ketab, then went out together with my family to have dinner. It was nice. The four of us, talking and joking, that’s all what I need.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 11:53 PM, | 3 comments