It's out there in my dreams..

Sunday, February 27, 2005
Dreaming was one of the difficult things for me to do.. I’ve always been that kind of a practical person who have no place for dreaming and that fancy world.. it’s either I have it.. I see it.. or else never think of it..

I’ve been that stone hearted person.. who always talk facts.. never had that taste for imagination.. always viewed life as 1+1 = 2.. life has always been in that digital form it’s either zero or one..

But as time went by.. and as I started to understand.. and have a different view of the world around.. I started to feel that I’m missing smth out there.. I’m imprisoning myself within these facts I was taught.. life is not like that..

Started dreaming.. found that it’s not hurting.. on the contrary, it was very much of help.. I’ve had my own world of dreams, a world were everything is settled according to the way I want it.. it’s among my dreams where I find peace of mind.. where I find myself.. where I find what I can’t find in the real world..

Why give myself much of a hard time.. when I’ve got it all.. it’s out there in my dreams..
posted by MoonLightShadow at 6:15 PM, | 5 comments

How did it start..

Well.. I’m still new to this blogging thing… and kind of lost here..

Anyways, it’s not what I’m gonna be telling u about.. let me tell u how this thing started with me..

About a week ago.. I came across one of my friends blog.. and it was the first time for me to know what is that thing.. to be frank.. I wasn’t that much interested.. but came another friend of mine who insisted that I should be making my own blog.. I thought okay.. why not give it a try..

And here it is.. I started browsing other blogs.. and somehow I’m getting interested..

Won’t be giving u much of a headache.. just a final thing..

Thanks to my friends.. bluelue & Shex..
posted by MoonLightShadow at 5:36 PM, | 3 comments

Still don't know what am I gonna be doing here..

Saturday, February 26, 2005
Still I don't know what is it that I'm gonna do here.. I don't know whether I'll be keeping it or not.. am I gonna change how it looks or not.. but anyways.. till I decide, here is some feelings that I once wrote..

.. it’s the feeling of being lost.. not belonging to that world.. wanting to disappear from here.. what is it that I want.. what is it that I’m fighting for, if ever I did.. and if I didn’t, does it mean there is nothing to fight for.. do I really care for people I think I care about them?!! Or it’s just an illusion that I’m eluding myself with, to feel good about myself.. how would I ask people to give me what I’m not giving..

.. is it success that I’m looking for.. or it’s just feeling happy with whatever I’ve got.. if it is success, then when would I say that I’ve reached it, if ever I did.. is it success in my personal life and my relations with people.. or it’s being successful in my career.. what if I reached that success, but I’m not happy.. what if I reached that success but not in the right career, this means I’ve reached nothing.. then.. what is it that will give me that feeling, that of happiness..

.. but watch out.. is it really happiness that u r looking for.. or it’s smth else.. why do u have all these contradicting feelings deep inside.. u want to work.. u want to just stay doing nothing.. u want to stay away from people.. u want people to share u in whatever u r doing.. u want to be unique.. u want to be a copy cat from others.. u love people.. at the same time u might dislike them.. a word from a person u love may make u down.. a word from the same person would make u up.. what’s that?!!

Confused.. and lost.. want people to help me out.. and want them to stay away.. want that soothing words.. though I’ve had enough of them.. it’s only u who might help me out.. though it was u who did this to me..
posted by MoonLightShadow at 1:39 AM, | 4 comments