Still don't know what am I gonna be doing here..
Saturday, February 26, 2005
Still I don't know what is it that I'm gonna do here.. I don't know whether I'll be keeping it or not.. am I gonna change how it looks or not.. but anyways.. till I decide, here is some feelings that I once wrote..
.. it’s the feeling of being lost.. not belonging to that world.. wanting to disappear from here.. what is it that I want.. what is it that I’m fighting for, if ever I did.. and if I didn’t, does it mean there is nothing to fight for.. do I really care for people I think I care about them?!! Or it’s just an illusion that I’m eluding myself with, to feel good about myself.. how would I ask people to give me what I’m not giving..
.. is it success that I’m looking for.. or it’s just feeling happy with whatever I’ve got.. if it is success, then when would I say that I’ve reached it, if ever I did.. is it success in my personal life and my relations with people.. or it’s being successful in my career.. what if I reached that success, but I’m not happy.. what if I reached that success but not in the right career, this means I’ve reached nothing.. then.. what is it that will give me that feeling, that of happiness..
.. but watch out.. is it really happiness that u r looking for.. or it’s smth else.. why do u have all these contradicting feelings deep inside.. u want to work.. u want to just stay doing nothing.. u want to stay away from people.. u want people to share u in whatever u r doing.. u want to be unique.. u want to be a copy cat from others.. u love people.. at the same time u might dislike them.. a word from a person u love may make u down.. a word from the same person would make u up.. what’s that?!!
Confused.. and lost.. want people to help me out.. and want them to stay away.. want that soothing words.. though I’ve had enough of them.. it’s only u who might help me out.. though it was u who did this to me..
.. it’s the feeling of being lost.. not belonging to that world.. wanting to disappear from here.. what is it that I want.. what is it that I’m fighting for, if ever I did.. and if I didn’t, does it mean there is nothing to fight for.. do I really care for people I think I care about them?!! Or it’s just an illusion that I’m eluding myself with, to feel good about myself.. how would I ask people to give me what I’m not giving..
.. is it success that I’m looking for.. or it’s just feeling happy with whatever I’ve got.. if it is success, then when would I say that I’ve reached it, if ever I did.. is it success in my personal life and my relations with people.. or it’s being successful in my career.. what if I reached that success, but I’m not happy.. what if I reached that success but not in the right career, this means I’ve reached nothing.. then.. what is it that will give me that feeling, that of happiness..
.. but watch out.. is it really happiness that u r looking for.. or it’s smth else.. why do u have all these contradicting feelings deep inside.. u want to work.. u want to just stay doing nothing.. u want to stay away from people.. u want people to share u in whatever u r doing.. u want to be unique.. u want to be a copy cat from others.. u love people.. at the same time u might dislike them.. a word from a person u love may make u down.. a word from the same person would make u up.. what’s that?!!
Confused.. and lost.. want people to help me out.. and want them to stay away.. want that soothing words.. though I’ve had enough of them.. it’s only u who might help me out.. though it was u who did this to me..
posted by MoonLightShadow at 1:39 AM, | 
3 Comments:
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Hey bluelue.. thank u dear.. will be cheering up soon ;)
wanting too much, that hunger for life, for knowlege
passion..
being a fighter, winiing in a game in a play, maybe ..
hopes, dreams, being good in manythings maybe.. being lost just for the sake to be found in a place that doesnt exist..LIFE
is it a place?...
just a wave takes you down, soon it will drag u up and down , get drifted ..ya perhaps
but sooner or later, u ll drown
and sooner or later, the wave will crash to the shore..
and then only then , u ll be found..be YOU
just know, u are not alone..
sounds funny? ya some facts are too funny and so tragic but still its true..i can assure you
passion..
being a fighter, winiing in a game in a play, maybe ..
hopes, dreams, being good in manythings maybe.. being lost just for the sake to be found in a place that doesnt exist..LIFE
is it a place?...
just a wave takes you down, soon it will drag u up and down , get drifted ..ya perhaps
but sooner or later, u ll drown
and sooner or later, the wave will crash to the shore..
and then only then , u ll be found..be YOU
just know, u are not alone..
sounds funny? ya some facts are too funny and so tragic but still its true..i can assure you
Hey daydreamer.. thank u.. I really appreciate what u've said.. very well said.. poetic as always ;) and u know what.. it's very true.