Back to blabbering

Monday, October 23, 2006
I looked at today’s date, and checked my last’s post date.. was surprised to find out that’s almost 20 days.. It’s been a long time through which I tried venting off my feelings.. but whenever I sit and start writing, I don’t find anything to say.. confused and unbalanced thoughts which makes it difficult for me to express. However, I missed expressing.

Was having kind of a small challenge at work, it was putting me under pressure for a while, but thank God it went almost fine.

Feeling internally unbalanced and confused, having many issues that I need to resolve to be able to properly communicate with other people. Unfortunately, I reach nowhere whenever I try to work on this internal confusion.

Being unable to communicate in addition to my introvert self, made me left alone with my internal thoughts, something that I don’t usually like. I just keep going in endless loops, questioning and wondering without reaching anything!

I’m not having the whole week of eid as vacation, only first and second days, but I was very much in need to take the rest of the week of. That was mainly to; try relaxing a bit, spend some time with my mum, and prepare for my eid trip.

Don’t know why I’m not very enthusiastic about the trip this time.. about a week ago I was very much into it, but this enthusiasm is going down bit by bit. May be because I’m not in the mood of socializing. Well, most of the time I’m in this mood, nothing new about it. May be because I wanted to spend some time at home?! But I’m sure if I did, I’ll be bored easily, and won’t enjoy it.

As usual, I don’t know exactly what I want, I need to get everything, and that results in me not enjoying anything. A boring and a dull person as usual! Seems that I’m not feeling good towards myself these days!

One more thing, I miss being a child who can’t pass the 15th of Ramadan without getting her new Eid clothes, shoes and bag. I miss it. I remember how I used to wait for the eid to wear my new stuff.. wake up at the early morning.. go for the prayers with my aunt and cousin.. play with the balloons.. pass by my relatives for the 3eedya..

Currently, the only thing I’m thinking about is, how many days will I take off.. and how am I gonna invest them the best way possible.. no eid clothes, actually I have the intension, but almost all shops have their winter collection, which will not by anyway match the current weather..

Still, looking forward for a happy eid with whatever I’ve got to make myself happy.. and wish you all a happy and joyful eid.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 1:52 AM, |

3 Comments:

Wish you a great time on your Eid trip! Maybe you get to spend a wonderful time, who knows :)

Don't be so hard on yourself, be constructive in judging yourself. I know, hard not to cross the line :)
Happy Eid ya Moon, hope you are having so much fun by now. As for new clothes, fa lazem..you have to guy buy anything gdid...believe me, it totally shifts the mood :D
Alina, you were right, I spent a wonderful time, it was one of the best trips I've done..

Nerro, I got new stuff, bas didn't wear them fi el eid, bas the eid was kinda cool and I had so much fun el 7amdullah.