Distant
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Suddenly I’m having that feeling of being distant from all people around. It’s nothing that anyone did to me.. but I’m just unable to communicate and socialize. It happens a lot to me, but not all people understand.
I’m even feeling the distance between me and myself.. I guess that’s the reason. How would I connect with others if I can’t connect with my own self?!
Sometimes I’m fine with it, knows that it will take its time and I’ll be back to normal. But other times I feel I’m pressured by that feeling.. feeling sometimes that I’m rude, selfish, arrogant..
May be I’m not satisfied with who I am, wanting to be that other person, however I’m not meant to be that person. isn’t that true?! I guess yes. You can not easily be who you want to be. That inner characteristics of me are not compatible with being that other person I want to be. I don’t like admitting that, but I’m tired from struggling with myself and with the surroundings.
At times I think that I should go with the flow, stop resisting, just observe my surrounding environment and fit myself!
I’m even feeling the distance between me and myself.. I guess that’s the reason. How would I connect with others if I can’t connect with my own self?!
Sometimes I’m fine with it, knows that it will take its time and I’ll be back to normal. But other times I feel I’m pressured by that feeling.. feeling sometimes that I’m rude, selfish, arrogant..
May be I’m not satisfied with who I am, wanting to be that other person, however I’m not meant to be that person. isn’t that true?! I guess yes. You can not easily be who you want to be. That inner characteristics of me are not compatible with being that other person I want to be. I don’t like admitting that, but I’m tired from struggling with myself and with the surroundings.
At times I think that I should go with the flow, stop resisting, just observe my surrounding environment and fit myself!
posted by MoonLightShadow at 10:30 PM, | 
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