A state of not knowing!!

Wednesday, February 08, 2006
I wonder what’s about these feelings I’m having. I don’t know even what kind they are. It’s a stormy and windy weather in the inside. Couldn’t imagine me missing it. Was about to cry for not going. But come on, why go? Umm, I don’t know. Was jumping out of joy for knowing that I’ll be able to go. But there was that hidden feeling of fear. Fear of what? I went, and wished I didn’t. No, I was happy for going, or wasn’t I? Is it over? Or it’s not?! May be it’s over but it’s me who is resisting that. Or may be it’s not over and I’m convincing myself it is.
 
posted by MoonLightShadow at 11:37 PM, |

8 Comments:

That doesn't sound really good. Bossy, whine, mellow, hit someone in the face, just don't be hursh on yourself...quit bombarding yourself with question will cause only pain!! what for?!! take it easy on yourself ya MOON
if i may not agree with nerro... sometimes its really irritating asking such kind of questions to yourself.. bombaring it at a time..
but at the end of the day, u'll reach something, even if its a highlight to notice something in tth near future..

cheers moooon :)
Exactly right ya blue..but that is in some cases. But in some others...the conclusion is already there..u just keep asking urself questions for nothing...u just hurt urself badly nothing more. Fahmani a2sod eih??
I get both of you Blue and Nerro.. Sometimes questions make you reach something, other times it does nothing except confusing you more.

One thing I'm sure of, some questions can't be answered, some actions can't be justified, it's an inner feeling that guides you at the moment without a logical reason except feeling that you want to do that. Whether it's was a right decision or not doesn't matter, what matters is I did what I felt like doing at the moment.
The most important is your state after this moment
Dear Moon,
You have said it all, I asked these questions b4 to myself. and I reached the same conclusion, I asl myself and sometimes other people these questions when I don't know the whole truth and I start reading between the lines. or that there is something that I don't want to admit so I wish I was wrong and hope someone tells me know, u got that wrong and tell me what I wanted to believe or hear.
Moon no matter what the truth is, it's gonna take sometime and one day ... new things will take over them and it will sink deep down in the memory no matter was it a good or a bad thing. life goes on, wish things will be clearer for both of us :)and pleasant as well.
Tota, the state is a state of confusion!

Nesreena, I agree that new things is gonna take over them, and may be that's exactly what's happening these days. It's already a memory. Don't know if it's a good or a bad one, but I only wish I could return back time, though I wasn't happy before, but the feeling was precious, even if it was an illusion, or a fake feeling, but still it meant something. And may be that's what creats the confusion, my need to live a feeling I used to have in the past and which doesn't exsit anymore, or that's what I think.
i meant after the puzzled Qs & the confusion