Monday, January 23, 2006
Yeah.. it’s different.. not feeling the same anymore.. I’m not happy with that, though I wasn’t happy before.
That particular time of the year meant a lot for me before.. it always recorded the peek of my happiness.. used to wait for it the whole year.. but not anymore!
However, I was waiting for the day I’ll lose interest.. I knew the day will come.. but didn’t know it will be that fast..
I still remember how I felt last year, and the year before, and the year before, and the year before… 4 years ago.
Wish the years will come back.. wish the feeling is back again..
I miss the feeling, but I can’t get it back again..
posted by MoonLightShadow at 10:41 PM, |
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
**Ever felt a huge enthusiasm deep inside you, but you are too hesitant where should you direct it?!!
I guess that’s how I’m feeling. Have been filling myself, or have been filled with a lot of motivation. The only problem is it’s undirected!
Well, I guess it’s directed, but towards two different things, I’m afraid to say contradicting ways.
One way is my career development, loving my work, and excelling in it, not just doing it. The other way is fulfilling my dream, and having that small project of my own. Each has it’s pros and cons, each I’m very enthusiastic about it. Don’t want one of them to get a higher priority than the other, nor do I want to take wrong decisions.
My father of course is against my small dream, and the stubborn me might just go for it for the sake of stubbornness and nothing more. That’s a probability.
**Couple of days ago, a flower exhibition was opened, visited it the second day it was opened, but only had a very quick tour for they were closing. Today, wanted to go again, after going round and round to be able to enter since it’s the book fair and they are complicating the entrance of people, I finally managed to get in. Unfortunately, I found them removing the flower exhibition stuff and closing it today, though I read in the newspaper that it’s till Thursday, that's the result of depending on misleading information. Anyways, was very disappointed, because I was waiting for that exhibition for a long time.
Thought, I should make use of the opportunity, and check part of the book fair. To my misfortune they were closing as well. I wonder why do they close that early?!
Going home, was driving through Salah Salem to be surprised that it’s very clean, policemen everywhere, no traffic jam.. it was perfect. But guess why is that? Simply because some of the African teams were arriving today for the Soccer African Cup. I wonder if they have the ability to prevent traffic jam, and ease things for people, why don’t they do that everyday?!!
posted by MoonLightShadow at 9:29 PM, |
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
It was Nermeena's post that reminded me with these two photos that I love. They were shot last Ramadan.P.S. They are not my shots they are my father's.
posted by MoonLightShadow at 7:16 PM, |
Sunday, January 15, 2006
Her heart and soul are screaming, they are lost in a vast place, they only get their echo. They are not screaming for someone to listen, rather to feel they are still alive, it’s the only thing they can do. Or are they screaming from pain?! Endless and continuous.
They pretend to be strong, but they are the most fragile. They declare they don’t need people, when they are in the most need to them. They are aching, and she is smiling. When they start talking, she shut them up. They need care, love, and help, but she is stubborn. She wants to teach them the hard way.
People do hurt them with the least thing done, simple and small things, but they do hurt more than a deep cut.
posted by MoonLightShadow at 8:44 PM, |
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Feeling better than yesterday.
The vacation is about to come to an end :( and will be back to work. So, how was your vacations?
Mine was better than expected. The last plan was spending the vacation at home, but at the last moment that plan changed.. and I went to the trip I was wishing for :D
You can’t imagine how happy I was despite the fact that we didn’t complete it to the end, we only went for two days, but they were what I wanted.
Two days of short hikes. First was hiking wadi el Arbaen, then we went into El Ghola Cave, to see the endemic plant Rosa Arabica at its entrance. After walking for a while we had some rest and drank tea with 7bak at 3am Ramadan where we had the chance of seeing Hyrax (Wabar in Arabic) then we hiked wadi Sharyj back to St. Katherine town.
The following day was the fun part, it was really very nice. We went to the White Canyon and Arada Canyon about 70 km away from St. Katherine town. The Arada Canyon felt as if you are in one of those mazes where we are walking in very narrow space, climbing and descending rocks. I really liked it, felt like a little kid sliding on slides. (Will be updating the post with photos very soon).
Came back to Cairo the night of the feast. Spent the first day with family, second day at home, and today was fun went out with friends and had a family lunch out.
Still don’t want the vacation to end :(
posted by MoonLightShadow at 10:37 PM, |
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Feeling suffocated.. ran to my blog just to vent it off.
posted by MoonLightShadow at 11:48 PM, |
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Have been sitting for quite a long time in front of my computer, having the urge to write, but writing nothing.
It has been about a week since I last wrote anything.. many things to say, but not arranged. They are just ideas that pop into my mind every now and then, and whenever I sit to let them out, they just vanish.
Was planning to take a blogging break, don’t know for how long, may be one day, one week, one month. The purpose of that break was to free that part of my mind for something else, a new passion that I’m having. Something that I want to dedicate for it all my time, and I thought I should stop blogging for it consumes a lot from my brain power because it makes me alert all day long for things happening around, and things going through my mind.
However, I discovered that I can’t do that, it’s a habit, even before blogging, I used to write in a diary, I can’t stop my brain from working, thinking, and contemplating.
*During that week, that new rose in the garden grew and became such a mature lovely red rose. Everyday in the morning, I stop by it, watch it for a while, and have a conversation with it. If only I can have that rose there forever, but this never happens, good things in our lives die sooner or later, but that just happen for leaving a space for better things to take their place.
*We had a new colleague, and that might be threatening my blog. I discovered that she is a blogger, or at least she browses blogs. I was shocked to find out that. I was just hoping that none of my colleagues know anything about blogging because I need to keep that place a place to run to when I have something to say, without thinking who might be reading.
Umm.. still, haven’t seen her browsing my blog till now, thank God :D
*So, where did u spend your new year’s eve?
Mine was such a bad evening!!! I was attending an engagement of one of my relatives, and seems that I’m not a social creature. I just can’t tolerate such occasions, especially when everything around is fake. Everything, the people, the smiles, the talk, the greetings, everything! I felt suffocated in the place. Don’t know whether it’s me who have something wrong, or it’s them?!!
*No plans for the vacation till now :( Seems it will be all in Cairo, if not at home. Very tiny probability of going to Alex for one or two days max.
Thought, if I’m gonna spend the 3eed here, I should buy 3eed clothes, but I hate shopping. Can’t find anything, and whenever I shop for clothes, I discover that I’m in an urgent need for going on a diet :S
Wish you all a happy vacation and a happy feast :))
posted by MoonLightShadow at 11:40 PM, |
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Carry out 2005 resolutions!
posted by MoonLightShadow at 3:41 PM, |